INTRODUCTION
Some women enter relationships even marriage with men they barely know. People divorce but they don’t think they will. When you choose a partner, you should realize you are choosing a lot of things, including your parenting partner and someone who will deeply influence your children. Someone they will look up to as a role model. This is a very important life decision to get right because after some women have gotten it wrong, they do everything they can to keep their relationships at all cost with the hope that their commitment will be reciprocated. I know that many of us wonder why many good, smart and otherwise logical women end up choosing life partners that leave them dissatisfied and unhappy. The ability of a man to enter into a loving long-term relationship is dependent on his character and personality. Men and women have different characteristics and qualities that when properly combined, achieve completion, harmony and the balance that makes relationships sustainable. The more you think about the long term consequences of making a bad choice, the more likely it is that you will make the right choice. So knowing how overwhelmingly important it is to pick the right life partner, a single woman should give it a serious thought and not rely on fate, hoping for the best after the mistake has been made. So when you have to make a choice always avoid men with the following characteristics.
LIAR
Trust is the lubricant of relationships because where there is high level of trust between partners marital bliss flourishes. When your partner willingly deceives you, it is obvious he cannot be trusted; as a result you are not likely to have a happy married life. A liar will often make promises he cannot keep. He will make up stories which are not true. In order for your relationship to flourish, you have to be able to rely on him. The fundamental quality for a happy married life is trust. If you can no longer trust your partner, this is automatic red flag that the marriage is in danger. If you are dating a man who is prone to lying and making up stories, it will do you a world of good to quit the relationship.
ABUSIVE MAN
If you feel you are being bullied and manipulated by your partner, it is advisable to end the relationship. I have heard women complain of their partner; “He beats me. I’m tired of being beaten.” Another had said, “I had to leave my husband. He beats me such that my life was in danger. I was in the hospital for months.” Apart from beating, another form of abuse is not being allowed to make decisions. He will decide the persons you can or cannot talk to, the type of dresses you can or cannot wear. He tries to dominate or intimidate you at any time. They are usually jealous and suspicious of your relationship with others and try to keep tabs on you at every moment of the day. It is important you let him know from day one that there is an extend you are willing to bend backwards. If you don’t, he will believe you are desperate to stay in the relationship and the more he will expect you to bend. You are supposed to be the one who gets to decide what you can or cannot do.
WOMANIZER
When you first meet a chronic cheater, you will wonder why some women have not walked with him down the aisle long ago. No matter how you approach him with caution, his charm and persistence will win you over. His lovely treatment will make you want to take the relationship to the next level. If you are looking for a long term relationship, drop the womanizer and try to meet someone else who is also looking for a lasting and deep relationship. However, if you are dating a womanizer, this next phase may not come. Womanizers are players, and always want to keep your relationship in a superficial level without any serious commitment. They are often vague about their whereabouts and plans; and are constantly texting other women. Then when you start thinking of introducing him to your family, he will suddenly disappear. He will not introduce you to his family or friends which go to show that he is not considering any serious and lasting relationship. In the end, they will break your heart, shatter your ego and get you frustrated. A lady has regretted marrying her husband. She married him because he was wealthy without taking other things into consideration. It was her worst mistake in life, she claimed. He proposed to her after several months of dating and she gladly accepted. During their honeymoon, he did not make any physical contact with her but was rather completely absorbed in pressing his phone. When he fell asleep, she took his phone and discovered he had been chatting with several women.
SELFISH MAN
Selfish men will only think of themselves. They always put their interests first. Any man you date who show little interest in your needs and emotions is selfish and should be left immediately. Marrying such a man will end in frustrating experiences and even divorce.
ARROGANT MAN
Arrogant man always feels that he is the greatest man on earth. He has an over-inflated ego and he tries to show that he is an expert at virtually everything. He is usually brilliant and accomplished which contributes to making him have unflagging belief in his infallibility. No decision you take is always right. If the man, you are currently dating have this characteristics you should look for someone else.
LAZY MAN
When you are dating it is not only the man that should do all things but when he puts no efforts in the relationship; you have to always contact him and have to do everything to keep the relationship afloat, then the relationship is not balanced. He depends on you to pay most of the bills when you go out on a date. You are with the wrong man if he takes advantage of your nurturing and caretaking. Both of you should create time to be together and get to know each other. If you do all the giving and he only receives without giving anything in return, this relationship will not end well. He has the ability to get into your wallets as well as your bed. If he feels nonchalant about earning a living, then you should better spend your time with someone else.
MOM’S MAN
He is affectionate and understanding but unfortunately, he is still tied to his mom’s control. His mother influences his decisions in virtually all areas of his life. She decides the type of woman he should date, where he should live, who he should vote for and even the car he should drive. You are bound to have a running battle with his mother if you decide to marry such a man. He has no clear values. He is weak and irresolute.
UNCOMMITTED MAN
This man is not committed to the relationship. It is off and on type of relationship. He will go out with you for some time on dates and you will no longer hear from him for some time. When you have concluded that he is gone, he will call most likely in the night. You cannot depend on the man who calls you when he wants to, maybe because he is bored or because he is looking for company or fun. You should look for a man who places priority on having you in his life. You should avoid this kind of man whose intention is to use and dump you.
UNAFFECTIONATE MAN
Dating a man who is emotionally unavailable is a great challenge. He may never open up to you. He keeps his opinions bottled up. If you are looking for a meaningful relationship, it is best to avoid such a man because he will never let you fully into his life. He will always keep you at arm’s length and will never let his guard down. This attitude will make it very difficult if not impossible to getting to know the real person you are dating.
CONCLUSION
When you fail to make the right choice, don’t attempt to foist responsibility for your failed marriage on others. Marrying the wrong man will undermine your characters, weaken your resolve and diminish your humanity. Most times, women don’t accept complete responsibility for their lives. They continually complain, criticise and make endless excuses. They blame the men for the things in their lives about which they are not happy. The consequences of this way of thinking, however, can be disastrous in achieving harmony in marriage. They sabotage all hopes of achieving success and happiness in marriage. The best remedy is to choose carefully and wisely when you decide to marry.
