It's the same story everywhere, over and over again.
Boy meets girl. There's chemistry, attraction, lust. They go on dates, talk and flirt. One of them proposes and before you know, they're dating.
Soon, they're in love.
Eventually, holding hands, they walk down the aisle. And live happily ever after.
Every book, every movie professes the same theory. It's what we've been fed as a steady diet. It's what we've grown up believing. It's what's our idea of love. And this is how love is, right?
Love is never this easy, never this simple.
Don't believe what books and movies tell you. Love is a lot of hard work!
Let's face it: Every single love story is different!
It's the first and foremost truth about love. If you're going about expecting something magical, then sorry to burst your bubble, there is no such obvious magic on display.
Firstly, you can't just decide to fall in love.
Yes, love happens but it happens at its own sweet time. Sometimes, months. Sometimes, even years. Matters of the heart aren't like express delivery.
Pehli nazar mein pyaar? This isn't a cliched Hindi film, you see!
Looking at a girl and hearing a violin in the background? That's just lust, my friend and you got to stop thinking so hard about it!
We all have our own love journeys, each one different than the other.
Just because your friends started dating in school and ended up getting married, doesn't mean your love story is any lesser just because your partner wasn't in class with you.
Stop comparing your story with someone else's, can you?
Life isn't meant to be a certain way. Love isn't supposed to be just one way. Some people find love sooner than most people. Some take time, traversing tricky paths. For some, it's one relationship that lasts forever. And for others, multiple relationships lead to that one forever-and-ever one!
Who's to decide which one is more passionate? Which story got love right?
Frankly, love isn't about right or wrong. It's about feeling the love and staying in it.
A relationship needs work. Lots and lots of work.
You won't wake up smiling every day. You won't feel the love all the time. There'll be fights and disagreements, anger, frustration and even, fatigue. You'll have to apologize. You'll have to make up. And sometimes, you'll have to leave him/her alone.
Relationships won't be a bed of roses. Certainly not the way they're shown in rom-coms.
You'll get jealous because of another person. You'll feel you're not valued enough. You'll want to cheat. You'll feel ignored or taken for granted. And you'll feel you're not valued enough.
And you'll have to work your way through it. Every single day. For the rest of your life!
That's just the way it is. No other way out!
Why is it that we're only seeing unhappy relationships around us?
Slowly but surely, we're losing our faith in love. It's becoming an urban legend. Something we've only heard or seen in the lives of other people but seldom our own. We're dissapointed. Like, majorly dissapointed.
Wondering why? Because we've come to associate love with all things pleasant!
Yes, love is amazing. The smile you get at the end of a long, hard day is beyond magical. A hug to make you feel alive. A kiss to liven up your soul. A touch that gives you goosebumps. It's all there and it's all worth it.
But unfortunately, just like every good thing, love too comes with a few negatives.
But no one told us that, right?
While we've learnt to accept imperfections in everything in life, somehow, we're not ready to accept love as imperfect.
But love is like that.
It's imperfect, messed up, crazy, weird and everything else it is. Because love is just like us. It's a reflection of who we are. What else was it supposed to be? It's a part of us. In us. Around us. Between us. It can't be anything else but like us.
We're all made of various things, some great and some not so great. Together, these make us the people we turn out to be. Part sane and sorted, part all over the place. And that's what defines us. Keeps us different. Different from everyone around. It's what makes us beautiful.
Our mess isn't like anyone else's. It's just our own. Like our love.
True love isn't about finding someone perfect. It's about loving someone's imperfections.
We're so busy looking for someone to tick our check-list, we've forgotten what's it like to not have one. The idea of a candle-lit dinner is so deeply engraved, we've not even thought about sitting at home, cooking Maggi and eating it from one plate. We're so engrossed in finding the one with the perfect body, we've forgotten how to fall in love with someone's soul.
Love in real-life isn't like it's shown in movies. It isn't as grand as written about in books.
It's imperfect. It's frustrating. It's messed-up. You'll feel the highs and the lows. You'll enjoy the ups and face the downs.
You'll laugh in love and cry in it too. You'll hate being in love and love being in it too.
Don't expect it to be perfect. Rather, don't want perfection. Let it be the way it's meant to be.
No conditions, no expectations. Just love.
Crazy stupid love!
Article by Saurav Bhanot Culled from SCOOP WHOOP.