Sunday, 19 October 2014


Most of today’s homes have, at least, one television and many of these sets are hooked to a commercial cable system that provides a seemingly limitless number of programs. Television has a consideration impact on influencing our morals, thinking and culture. Why and to what extent should parents control their children’s TV watching? There is certainly nothing inherently wrong with watching TV. The problem is how much television should a child watch and what effect it has on his life.
Some parents, who worry that their children are being exposed to programs, meant for adults that they are too young to handle, tend to say television is the culprit. Setting limits on television viewing is crucial to your child’s development because research has shown that as the amount of time spent watching TV goes up, the amount of time devoted not only to homework and study but other important aspects of life such as social development and physical activities decreases.
The National Coalition for The Protection of Children and Families, Annual Report 1995 wrote, “Today’s kids are learning their attitudes and values more from television and movies than from any other source. It is estimated that in the United States, by the time a youngster gets out of high school, he has watched more than 20,000 hours of television, witnessed 15,000 murders, and watched 100,000 alcohol-related commercials.”
Jerry Johnson in his book It’s Killing Our Kids wrote, “Television programming and advertisements convey the message that drinking is fun, smoking is glamorous, and drugs are the ‘in’ thing. No wonder the crime rate is so high.”
Advertisers are good at conditioning their audience. While bringing us lots of information, television has also contributed heavily to degrading our tastes; young children are easily attracted to and seduced by the flashy colors, intense sounds and fast moving images on the television screen thereby corrupting our morals increasing juvenile delinquency.
Watch the commercials with your children and talk together about what you’ve seen. Companies spend huge amount of money for commercials. Children see an ad for a particular brand of soft drink and go to the supermarket and buy that brand. They don’t want just any soft drink but only that brand. Why? Because they had been influenced by the commercial and act accordingly.
Television can be such an exciting medium for learning, but children need to use it wisely, not waste their childhood by watching things that are inappropriate or unacceptable. At this stage, there is a tremendous amount of learning to be done and should not be wasted watching television for too long because watching one favorite show leads to watching television for an extended period time. This reduces the time a child has left in her day to do other things. Children who watch excessive amounts of television, spend less time involved in creative activities and vigorous exercise, and develop an unhealthy pattern of passivity.
As youngsters get older, they should gradually be given discretion over program choice, as long as parents continue to monitor their viewing habits. It’s important for parents to spend time with their children in front of the set, and then talk about what they’ve seen. Television has some advantages though; it is an important teacher to some children.
One of the most disturbing is that young children become more violent themselves as teenagers, and begin to believe that violence is an acceptable way to deal with conflicts and problems because children often believe everything they see and hear on television commercials and tend to have more encounters with the law as adults.
Dr. Gail Gross wrote, “We know that for the most part, children learn from both experience and social learning or role modeling. Therefore, when children, especially young children, see violence on television, they have a difficult time differentiating between what is real or what is make believe, and tend to emulate or copy what they are seeing. Furthermore, there is a chemical change in the brain, similar to that which is seen in post-traumatic stress disorder; if enough violence is viewed, the brain reacts as if the person doing the viewing has actually been abused. This is especially true if the violence is one sided, as in the case of sadistic violence. Now add to this the fact that children who watch violence on television have brains that are still developing, and you can see how really dangerous TV viewing can be.”
What parents can do
Since television is clearly here to stay, parents are entitled to monitor what their children are actually watching on TV. The parents should consider a number of things: what TV offers the child in terms of information and knowledge and the impact of violence and sex, and the influence of commercials. Parents can and should establish house rules for TV viewing, how many hours a week children should watch television.
Parents should supervise their children's TV viewing by watching at least one episode of whatever their children's selections are so that the parents decide if the programming is appropriate and communicate their personal feelings about undesirable programs by discouraging their children from watching them. When programs designed specifically for young children go off, the television should go off. Beside this, parents should monitor the amount of TV their kids watch because it could negatively affect their vision. Watching too much TV can negatively affect a kid’s vision because they are trying to focus hard on what they are watching and can strain the eye. It could also take up valuable studying time they need each day, and lastly kids can become less intelligent. Parents can utilize the v-chip or cable/satellite parental controls on the less monitored televisions maintain control even when they are not in the room.
Parents can write to their local television station or to the program’s sponsors. While parents need time for themselves, they should avoid using television to keep their children occupied while they relax and enjoy downtime. Encourage your children to spend their free time in ways other than TV watching, such as playing football, reading, or any creative exercise like painting. Parents should view current events on television with their children so that they can explain any confusing or inappropriate material to their children.

Monday, 13 October 2014


A smile costs nothing, but it creates much.
It enriches those who receive it without impoverishing
 those who give it.
It happens in a flash, and the memory of it may last forever.
None are so rich that they can get along without it, and
none so poor that they cannot be richer for its benefits.  
It creates happiness in the home, fosters goodwill in a 
business, and is the countersigns of friends.
It is rest to the weary, daylight to the discouraged, sunshine
 to the sad, and nature’s best antidote for trouble.
Yet it cannot be begged, bought, borrowed, or stolen, for it is
something that is worth nothing to anyone until it is
given away.
In the course of the day, some of your acquaintances may
be too tired to give you a smile. Give them one of yours. Nobody
needs a smile so much as those who have none left to give.

Culled from You Can Win by Shiv Khera pp 185.


World, take my child by the hand –he starts school today!
It is all going to be strange and new to him for a while, and I wish you would sort of treat him gently. You see, up to now, he has been king of the roost. He has been the boss of the backyard. I have always been around to repair his wounds, and I have always been handy to soothe his feelings.
But now things are going to be different. This morning he is going to walk down the front steps, wave his hand, and start on a great adventure that probably will include wars and tragedy and sorrow.
To live in this world will require faith and love and courage. So, World, I wish you would sort of take him by his young hand and teach him the things he will have to know. Teach him –but gently, if you can.
He will have to learn, I know, that all people are not just –that all men and women are not true. Teach him that for every scoundrel, there is a hero; that for every enemy, there is a friend. Let him learn early that the bullies are the easiest people to lick.
Teach him the wonder of books. Give him quiet time to ponder the eternal mystery of birds in the sky, bees in the sun, and flowers on a green hill. Teach him that it is far more honorable to fail than to cheat. Teach him to have faith in his own ideas, even if everyone tells him they are wrong.
Try to give my son the strength not to follow the crowd when everyone else is getting on the bandwagon. Teach him to listen to others, but to filter all he hears on a screen of truth and to take only the good that comes through.
Teach him never to put a price tag on his heart and soul. Teach him to close his ears on the howling mob –and to stand and fight if he thinks he is right. Teach him gently, World, but do not coddle him, because only the test of fire makes fine steel.
This is a big order, World, but see what you can do. He is such a nice son.
                                                                                  Signed, Abraham Lincoln.

Culled from “You Can Win” by Shiv Khera, pp 161.

You must note that he said "Teach him gently, World, but do not coddle him because only the test of fire makes fine steel." So when you are over-pampering  your child, note that you're destroying him/her.

Saturday, 11 October 2014


·         Teach him to put a price tag on everything and he will put his integrity for sale.
·         Teach him never to take a stand and then he will fall for anything.
·         Make him believe that winning is not everything, that it is the only thing and he will make every effort to win by hook and crook.
·         Give a child everything he wants right from infancy and he will grow up believing that the world owes him a living and everything will be handed to him on a platter.
·         When he picks up bad language, laugh at him. This will make him think he is cute.
·         Don’t ever give him any moral or ethical values. Wait until he is 21 and let him “determine his own.”
·         Give him choices without direction. Never teach him that every choice has a consequence.
·         Never tell him he is wrong he might develop a complex. This will condition him to believe that society is against him when he gets arrested for doing something wrong.
·         Always pick up things that he leaves lying around –books, shoes, clothes and so on. Do everything for him so that he will learn to push all responsibilities onto others.
·         Let him read, watch and hear anything he wants. Be careful what he feeds his body, but let his mind feed on garbage.
·         In order to be popular with his peers, he must go along to get along.
·         Quarrel frequently when he is present. This way he won’t be surprised when things fall apart at home.
·         Give him as much money as he wants. Never teach him respect for the value of money. Make sure he does not have things as tough as you did.
·         Provide instant gratification for al sensual desires such as food, drink and comfort. Deprivation can cause frustration.
·         Side with him against neighbors and teachers, as they are prejudiced against him.
·         When he gets into trouble, excuse yourself by saying, “I tried my best but could never do anything with him.”
·         Don’t put your foot down because you believe discipline takes away freedom.
·         Prefer remote control to parental control in order to teach independence.

      Culled from You Can Win by Shiv Khera.

Friday, 10 October 2014


You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
You cannot enrich the poor by impoverishing the rich.
You cannot establish sound security on borrowed money.
You cannot help the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer.
You cannot build character and courage by taking away
man’s initiative and independence.
You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.
You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than you earn.
You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what

 they could and should do for themselves.


To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out for another is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your ideas, your dreams, before a crowd is to risk
their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To hope is to risk despair.
 To try is to risk failure.
But risks must be taken, because the greatest
hazard in life is to risk nothing.
The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has
nothing, and is nothing.
They may avoid suffering and sorrow, but they
cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, or live.
Chained by their attitudes, they are slaves,
they have forfeited their freedom.
Only a person who risks is free.

Culled from You Can Win by Shive Khera.

Tuesday, 7 October 2014


It is a common saying that people don’t appreciate what they have. Rather some will become jealous of other people’s assets, ignoring their own. It is not possible in life to have everything. No human being is perfect, so you should be able to know your strengths and weaknesses. Change the things you can and accept the things you can’t change with dignity. The insatiable nature of human beings especially women when it comes to their looks or God’s endowment made this survey necessary. This is what some ladies said:

“Well it’s hard to know what exactly the part of my body that guys is crazy about. Some say my eyes do the magic. They give me the impression that I’ve got the kind of eyes that would turn any guy on. Some others can’t stop talking about my shape. Some guys say a have a sexy carriage,” Evelyn said.

Sarah had this to say about what she felt is her greatest asset, “Some guys are crazy about my waist-line and flexibility.”

“I think it is my voice. Anytime I speak guys say I have got seductive voice. Some say the way I walk is romantic,” Pamela informed me.
“It’s my hips. Guys are crazy about my hips, even my female friends say I’ve got incredible hips. Guys can’t resist it, they keep coming,” Maurine said with a smile.
“Three things make me stand out. They are my looks, stature and above all my friendship. I know I have these assets but when the guys say it, it makes me feel good,” Clara accepted.

“I know I have a terrific physique. However, my boobs seem to be the center of attraction. They can’t take their eyes off my chest. They are always staring at that part of my body. The other thing that drives them crazy is my backside,” Selena said with confidence.

“My lips, of course. Men tell me they like my lips. They say I have kissable lips. Some of them say mere looking at my lips turn them on. I also have attractive hips. Guys say I look sexy and hot in trousers,” Sally proudly said.
“Men are crazy about my legs. They disturb me a lot anytime I wear short skirt. My legs are hot and sexy,” Juliet said.
So what is your own biggest asset? You have to say something. If you don’t know, find out and use it to your advantage and stop being jealous of others’ assets. You have yours, nurture it and men will come seeking for your attention.

Monday, 6 October 2014


If you think you are beaten, you are
If you think you dare not, you don’t
If you would like to win, but you think you can’t
It is almost certain you won’t
If you think you will lose, you’ve lost
For out in the world we find,
Success begins with a fellow’s will
It is all in the state of the mind
If you think you are outclassed, you are
You’ve got to think high to rise
You’ve got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win a prize
Life’s battles don’t always go
To the stronger or faster man
For sooner or later the man who wins
Is the man who thinks he can.